There is really no new news on the weight loss. I did not lose any weight as of Sunday, but I did not gain any either, which is good. I am continuing my challenge and I WILL SUCCEED. I will succeed because I want to, because too many people told me I wouldn't, because my children deserve a healthy mama, because I want to be "sexy" for my husband. I am going to get through this and come out a better person in the end. I have a little less then 11 months to lose 45lbs.
I have a lot on my mind lately, mostly just questioning where I stand in my own life and how people come in and out of life so easily. I amazes me everyday how we think we know about people and we think the relationship/friendship shared with that person is something more then it really is. The actuality that the relationship was not what we thought is hurtful, like a knife to the heart. When you share special things with this person, when you tell them deep dark secrets, when you do everything in your power to relate to them and accomodate them. Just like that it is not like that and things are different. I am who I am, take it or leave it, but do know if you leave it, you leave it, no turning back. I am great person, I am a genuine friend, I am a loving, caring, kind, passionate, warm person UNTIL you cross me and I am afraid there are a lot of people getting to that point.
With all that said, TJ and I are better then ever. It's crazy that we have been together not quite 13 years, and we just keep getting stronger as the years pass. Honestly he is the only person other then my children that I have 100% all the time. He is defintely my best friend and I could not imagine a day without him. He keeps me going and reminds me everyday how much he loves me, unconditionally!
I have so much more to say, but not enough time. I will try to post later!
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